Stephen Colbert Brutally Mocks Trumps If I Was Going to Do a Coup Rant

Stephen Colbert opened his Late Show monologue Thursday night by explaining that he would prefer to “forget” about the former president.

“Since the day he went out and lied about the election, I try not to say his name,” he said, referencing the broadcast during which he literally shed tears over Donald Trump’s false declaration of victory. “We don’t show his name on air. I don’t do my impression, because haven’t you suffered enough?”

“But there are times when you just have to slap yourself in the face, put a little cold water on the back of your neck, bear down on the bite stick, and remind yourself just how bad it was by repeating out loud the simple fact: ‘Donald Trump is a fascist.’”

The declaration carried extra weight because it stemmed directly from former Chairman of the Joint Chiefs Gen. Mark Milley, who reveals in the new book I Alone Can Fix It that he feared Trump would attempt a coup and made plans to prevent him from pulling it off.

“They may try, but they’re not going to fucking succeed,” Milley told his deputies, according to reporters Carol Leonnig and Philip Rucker. “You can’t do this without the military. You can’t do this without the CIA and the FBI. We’re the guys with the guns.”

“General, that is not as reassuring as you think,” Colbert said. “May I remind you, this is America. We’re all the guys with guns.”

In response to Milley, Trump released a truly disturbing statement in which he first said that he’s “not into coups” and then added, “If I was going to do a coup, one of the last people I would want to do it with is General Mark Milley.”

“OK, you’ve clearly put some thought into this thing you’re not into,” Colbert shot back. He then imitated a man who tells his wife, “Honey, come on, I’m not into three-ways. But if I was, I wouldn’t do it with our neighbor Alice! Your sister is way hotter!”

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